Wot a pair of numpties ... :-)

A

Arfa Daily

Guest
A Dual 504 phono deck appeared on the bench today. "Parts removed by owner,
taped to turntable" said the job ticket. The owner had kindly dismantled the
arm gimbal ...

The parts on the turntable were a pointed screw, and a plastic washer. The
tracking weight setting wheel was laying at a crazy angle, and clearly, the
plastic washer was intended to fit into a slot just in front of it, and the
pointy screw was supposed to go through the lot, so that the point could
engage with the tiny bearing in the arm. In the centre of the setting wheel
was a threaded boss, so this was what the screw was intended to thread into.
Except it wouldn't. No matter how I tried it, the screw appeared to be too
large to fit this boss. I even took the wheel right out so that I could see
exactly what was going on, but no, the screw would not go into the thread in
the boss.

So I rang the shop, and spoke to the guy who booked it in. "Yep" said he. "I
know exactly what you're saying coz I tried it here, and I couldn't get it
to thread in either, so I thought perhaps I was assembling it wrong, so I'd
better send it over to you to look at". "Well no" said I. "I can't see any
other way it can go together either, so this can't be the screw that
originally came out of it. I wonder if it's one that he's picked up as a
spare part because he lost the original, and it's from a different model".
" I reckon that's gotta be it" said booking-in guy. "I'm gonna ring him and
see what he's got to say about it !"

Ten minutes later, he called back. "I spoke to him and told him that it's
the wrong screw, but he insisted that it was the one that came out of it. I
told him that it couldn't be because neither of us could get it to go in,
and that if he had lost it, he should just come clean and tell us, as it was
just wasting our time trying to get the wrong one to fit. But he still
insisted that it was the one that came out ". "Well, I don't know then" I
told him. "I'll just have to try again". I must admit, it was puzzling me
that the owner was adamant that it was the original screw, but that it
seemed too big for the only threaded hole that it could possibly go in.

I fiddled about with it for a few minutes longer, but then gave up, as I had
other more pressing things to do. I left the washer and screw in place, and
put a bit of Sellotape over the screw head to hold it in the hole until I
had time to take another look. I stuck it on another bench, and forgot about
it. For about ten minutes ... Have you ever had one of those 'light bulb'
moments ? Well, I had one then. From nowhere, this idea suddenly popped into
my head, so I picked up a screwdriver, wandered over to the other bench,
stuck the screwdriver into the head of the screw through the tape, and
turned it left ...

Doh ! >:-(

Arfa
 
I applied Holmes' Rule, and guessed that, as it was the only remaining
possibility.
 
On 2/08/2013 10:12 AM, Arfa Daily wrote:
A Dual 504 phono deck appeared on the bench today. "Parts removed by
owner, taped to turntable" said the job ticket. The owner had kindly
dismantled the arm gimbal ...

The parts on the turntable were a pointed screw, and a plastic washer.
The tracking weight setting wheel was laying at a crazy angle, and
clearly, the plastic washer was intended to fit into a slot just in
front of it, and the pointy screw was supposed to go through the lot, so
that the point could engage with the tiny bearing in the arm. In the
centre of the setting wheel was a threaded boss, so this was what the
screw was intended to thread into. Except it wouldn't. No matter how I
tried it, the screw appeared to be too large to fit this boss. I even
took the wheel right out so that I could see exactly what was going on,
but no, the screw would not go into the thread in the boss.

So I rang the shop, and spoke to the guy who booked it in. "Yep" said
he. "I know exactly what you're saying coz I tried it here, and I
couldn't get it to thread in either, so I thought perhaps I was
assembling it wrong, so I'd better send it over to you to look at".
"Well no" said I. "I can't see any other way it can go together
either, so this can't be the screw that originally came out of it. I
wonder if it's one that he's picked up as a spare part because he lost
the original, and it's from a different model". " I reckon that's gotta
be it" said booking-in guy. "I'm gonna ring him and see what he's got to
say about it !"

Ten minutes later, he called back. "I spoke to him and told him that
it's the wrong screw, but he insisted that it was the one that came out
of it. I told him that it couldn't be because neither of us could get it
to go in, and that if he had lost it, he should just come clean and tell
us, as it was just wasting our time trying to get the wrong one to fit.
But he still insisted that it was the one that came out ". "Well, I
don't know then" I told him. "I'll just have to try again". I must
admit, it was puzzling me that the owner was adamant that it was the
original screw, but that it seemed too big for the only threaded hole
that it could possibly go in.

I fiddled about with it for a few minutes longer, but then gave up, as I
had other more pressing things to do. I left the washer and screw in
place, and put a bit of Sellotape over the screw head to hold it in the
hole until I had time to take another look. I stuck it on another bench,
and forgot about it. For about ten minutes ... Have you ever had one
of those 'light bulb' moments ? Well, I had one then. From nowhere, this
idea suddenly popped into my head, so I picked up a screwdriver,
wandered over to the other bench, stuck the screwdriver into the head of
the screw through the tape, and turned it left ...

Doh ! >:-(

Arfa
**A common trap for the uninitiated. I got caught by left hand thread
arm bearing screws about 30 years ago. Once bitten......

--
Trevor Wilson www.rageaudio.com.au
 
I've done way worse. You know folks like me have to use used parts once in a while. So one day I replace this HV block or something, and got distracted or something for a minute, and put the old part right back in. Why didn't it work ? I replaced it !

Now I have a system for that. Well several. Sometimes the old part goes on the left and the replacement is on the right, obvioulsy because it is the "right" part to put in.

Other times however, there is not enough room on the bench so the bad part goes on the floor. Unless it falls on the floor in which case it has to go somewhere else. That could be on the left or the right, it depends.

So I am back where I started. Fuk you, quit laughing !
 
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