E
eDateReview
Guest
Linda signs on Lavalife a very popular dating website in Canada and the US. She gets bombarded with private messages and instant messages from guys from all over the world. She meets Gregg and likes his approach. They talk on the phone. While talking she sees Thomas and she didn't like the way Gregg coughed on the phone. She ends the conversation and moves on
.
Dating sites have become the big thing and in my eyes are destroying the sexes. There are so many. Lavalife, Match.com, adultfinder, yahoo just to name a few. Men see it as a flock of desperate women and sooner or later one will give Women see it as a mass of men giving them attention times a hundred.
There is a reason why when you see a person sparks fly. Going on the web to find a mate can be a positive experience as long as you go about it properly. I have found people use dating websites as a form of alcohol to drown their loneliness and then become addicted to the attention and accessibility. Once you become hooked the chances of you finding happiness is close to nil. I will try to show you these bad habits and help you steer clear from them.
Why a dating site?
You need to ask yourself why you are on Lavalife or any personal site like it in the first place. Don't confuse yourself. If you want an intimate encounter the logic of "acting" like you want friendship will confused the people looking at your profiles. This also is important in reverse. You will not be happy getting bombarded about sex if that is not what you're looking for. And please don't be fake. If you're on a web site that is notorious for "hucking up" don't play like you don't know. Ask yourself this; are there more holy people on this site than non holy? Would your mother approve of it? Would your boss?
Do you have any knowledge about marketing?
Let's get to the point, your trying to sell yourself period. Try to keep your profile to what you want. A sexual photo for a person who hates people constantly talking about sex is probably not the best thing to post. Post what you want to express to the pubic you are and what you want. And let's make sense. Why be upset that people are contacting you if you're on a dating site? Your marketing is working. Take it off if you don't want the attention.
Control
Being bombarded by men is very flattering. But keep in mind why you went to the website in the first place. Talking to everyone at once that you like will defeat the purpose of finding someone special if you do not give a person your full attention. Control also means self respect. Jumping from person to person really is lack of respect for you. You must have some type of standards. Use them.
Respect
If you decided you're looking for a man or a woman to date and you only want one. Once you meet a person on these sites you should STOP looking and start working on getting to know each other. What happens when you don't do this is, "well he wore blue I don't like blue " you become extremely picky because you know you can get a new man/woman in 30 seconds. You will keep coming back and your natural skills of meeting people in public will diminish as your online persona will intensify. You can not take your online persona into a restaurant and have dinner. Unless they have webcams at the tables.
Photos
The biggest fault of online dating is everything is wrapped around your photo.
Yes you want someone cute/sexy but you are judging a book by its cover. For some reason good looking people are lacking in the good personality department. Not all but a good chunk never took time to work on their other attractive skills since everyone loves them just by looking at them. Keep this in mind. Also keep in mind when you get a response this could be the reason why you got it in the first place. Do they even care about what is behind the face? Would you want to participate in a group that works this way?
Lies
My friend put me on here, I use it to keep in touch with my relatives and others are heard 50 times a day. If you lie to a person you just meet about nothing, imagine when something serious actually happens once you get to know them.
All in all I believe you should NOT go on dating websites to find a true love. When they started? Yes. Now? No. Maybe a site that has a good mix of the sexes and the topics are not so directed towards dating. Sprnch .com for example. Why? It's not in your face. You can get attached to them by getting to know more about them. Maybe you guys have something in common you would have never found out from a dating site.
Remember you're online because you have some spare time. Use it wisely. Always try to do things to have a productive outcome.
(original article)
http://www.sprnch.com/forums/showthread.php?t=6245
Dating sites have become the big thing and in my eyes are destroying the sexes. There are so many. Lavalife, Match.com, adultfinder, yahoo just to name a few. Men see it as a flock of desperate women and sooner or later one will give Women see it as a mass of men giving them attention times a hundred.
There is a reason why when you see a person sparks fly. Going on the web to find a mate can be a positive experience as long as you go about it properly. I have found people use dating websites as a form of alcohol to drown their loneliness and then become addicted to the attention and accessibility. Once you become hooked the chances of you finding happiness is close to nil. I will try to show you these bad habits and help you steer clear from them.
Why a dating site?
You need to ask yourself why you are on Lavalife or any personal site like it in the first place. Don't confuse yourself. If you want an intimate encounter the logic of "acting" like you want friendship will confused the people looking at your profiles. This also is important in reverse. You will not be happy getting bombarded about sex if that is not what you're looking for. And please don't be fake. If you're on a web site that is notorious for "hucking up" don't play like you don't know. Ask yourself this; are there more holy people on this site than non holy? Would your mother approve of it? Would your boss?
Do you have any knowledge about marketing?
Let's get to the point, your trying to sell yourself period. Try to keep your profile to what you want. A sexual photo for a person who hates people constantly talking about sex is probably not the best thing to post. Post what you want to express to the pubic you are and what you want. And let's make sense. Why be upset that people are contacting you if you're on a dating site? Your marketing is working. Take it off if you don't want the attention.
Control
Being bombarded by men is very flattering. But keep in mind why you went to the website in the first place. Talking to everyone at once that you like will defeat the purpose of finding someone special if you do not give a person your full attention. Control also means self respect. Jumping from person to person really is lack of respect for you. You must have some type of standards. Use them.
Respect
If you decided you're looking for a man or a woman to date and you only want one. Once you meet a person on these sites you should STOP looking and start working on getting to know each other. What happens when you don't do this is, "well he wore blue I don't like blue " you become extremely picky because you know you can get a new man/woman in 30 seconds. You will keep coming back and your natural skills of meeting people in public will diminish as your online persona will intensify. You can not take your online persona into a restaurant and have dinner. Unless they have webcams at the tables.
Photos
The biggest fault of online dating is everything is wrapped around your photo.
Yes you want someone cute/sexy but you are judging a book by its cover. For some reason good looking people are lacking in the good personality department. Not all but a good chunk never took time to work on their other attractive skills since everyone loves them just by looking at them. Keep this in mind. Also keep in mind when you get a response this could be the reason why you got it in the first place. Do they even care about what is behind the face? Would you want to participate in a group that works this way?
Lies
My friend put me on here, I use it to keep in touch with my relatives and others are heard 50 times a day. If you lie to a person you just meet about nothing, imagine when something serious actually happens once you get to know them.
All in all I believe you should NOT go on dating websites to find a true love. When they started? Yes. Now? No. Maybe a site that has a good mix of the sexes and the topics are not so directed towards dating. Sprnch .com for example. Why? It's not in your face. You can get attached to them by getting to know more about them. Maybe you guys have something in common you would have never found out from a dating site.
Remember you're online because you have some spare time. Use it wisely. Always try to do things to have a productive outcome.
(original article)
http://www.sprnch.com/forums/showthread.php?t=6245