R
Rich The Philosophizer
Guest
A: One.
OT: I've made up a joke: How many white guys does it take to
T
Tim Wescott
Guest
Rich The Philosophizer wrote:
Q: How many software engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Can't be done -- that's a hardware problem.
Q: How many radical feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: "That's _not_ funny!"
--
Tim Wescott
Wescott Design Services
http://www.wescottdesign.com
A: Only two - but first they have to get in the light bulb.
Q: How many software engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Can't be done -- that's a hardware problem.
Q: How many radical feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: "That's _not_ funny!"
--
Tim Wescott
Wescott Design Services
http://www.wescottdesign.com
R
Rich The Philosophizer
Guest
On Tue, 16 Nov 2004 22:14:33 -0800, Tim Wescott wrote:
A: Not a problem - we'll fix it in software.
Californians: Hot tub
JAPs: Two, one to open the diet pepsis, one to call daddy.
Blondes: One, holds bulb, world revolves around her
Real Men: Zero - aren't afraid of the dark
Real Ladies: Not applicable - a Real Lady dines by candlelight
Voters: "What's a 'Light bulb'?"
;^j
Rich
Q: How many hardware engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Not a problem - we'll fix it in software.
Psychiatrists: One, but the bulb really has to want to change
Californians: Hot tub
JAPs: Two, one to open the diet pepsis, one to call daddy.
Blondes: One, holds bulb, world revolves around her
Real Men: Zero - aren't afraid of the dark
Real Ladies: Not applicable - a Real Lady dines by candlelight
Voters: "What's a 'Light bulb'?"
;^j
Rich
D
Don Pearce
Guest
On Wed, 17 Nov 2004 07:29:04 GMT, Rich The Philosophizer
<null@example.net> wrote:
already?"
d
Pearce Consulting
http://www.pearce.uk.com
<null@example.net> wrote:
Middle-aged, New York Jewish women. "So I'll just sit here in the dark
already?"
d
Pearce Consulting
http://www.pearce.uk.com
M
Mikko Kiviranta
Guest
Microsoft engineers: Zero, just define the darkness an Industry Standard
..
K
Kevin Aylward
Guest
Mikko Kiviranta wrote:
1 One to define light bulb handle
2 One to instance light bulb handle
3 one to realize light bulb handle
4 One to create compatible light bulb handle
5 One to clear light bulb handle
6 One to copy data from existing light bulb handle...
....
.....
Kevin Aylward
salesEXTRACT@anasoft.co.uk
http://www.anasoft.co.uk
SuperSpice, a very affordable Mixed-Mode
Windows Simulator with Schematic Capture,
Waveform Display, FFT's and Filter Design.
Its much worse in the version I know, it like 282
1 One to define light bulb handle
2 One to instance light bulb handle
3 one to realize light bulb handle
4 One to create compatible light bulb handle
5 One to clear light bulb handle
6 One to copy data from existing light bulb handle...
....
.....
Kevin Aylward
salesEXTRACT@anasoft.co.uk
http://www.anasoft.co.uk
SuperSpice, a very affordable Mixed-Mode
Windows Simulator with Schematic Capture,
Waveform Display, FFT's and Filter Design.
C
ChrisGibboGibson
Guest
How many social workers to change a light bulb?
None of them would have the education or intelligence to do it. But 15 of them
could sit round a table for 6 months and write a leaflet called "coping with
darkness"
Gibbo
None of them would have the education or intelligence to do it. But 15 of them
could sit round a table for 6 months and write a leaflet called "coping with
darkness"
Gibbo
K
Kryten
Guest
"Tim Wescott" <tim@wescottnospamdesign.com> wrote in message
news:10plr1rpack9o02@corp.supernews.com...
A: "None. You can sodding well do it yourself!"
or
A: "How the hell should I know you utter bastard!"
news:10plr1rpack9o02@corp.supernews.com...
Q: How many pre-menstrual women does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: "None. You can sodding well do it yourself!"
or
A: "How the hell should I know you utter bastard!"
M
martin griffith
Guest
On 17 Nov 2004 10:48:18 GMT, in sci.electronics.design
chrisgibbogibson@aol.com (ChrisGibboGibson) wrote:
martin
Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
chrisgibbogibson@aol.com (ChrisGibboGibson) wrote:
martin
Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
K
Kryten
Guest
"martin griffith" <martingriffith@yahoo.co.uk> wrote in message
news:cbrmp0h24qaao40aou7gcijhubo2gas0f6@4ax.com...
for some strange reason. They saw women mysteriously bleeding each month and
thought "we can't have them doing something we can't". Their young men have
to sexually service their elders too.
So nasal fire isn't beyond human stupidity.
A lot of modern humans stuff burning shredded leaves in their mouths
already.
Z-ark material there eh?
news:cbrmp0h24qaao40aou7gcijhubo2gas0f6@4ax.com...
A tribe in Papua New Guinea poke sticks up their noses to induce nose bleeds
for some strange reason. They saw women mysteriously bleeding each month and
thought "we can't have them doing something we can't". Their young men have
to sexually service their elders too.
So nasal fire isn't beyond human stupidity.
A lot of modern humans stuff burning shredded leaves in their mouths
already.
Z-ark material there eh?
A
Active8
Guest
On Wed, 17 Nov 2004 09:03:45 GMT, Kevin Aylward wrote:
assignment statement) the handle with GetLightbulbHandle() which
takes an unitialized pointer to the light bulb handle and returns an
error code. You'd be assigning the error code to the handle. It has
to be "declared", pointed to, passed, stashed, slashed, and
degassed.
How many more people do you think that would take, Kevin?
--
Best Regards,
Mike
See, there's a bug after just one line. You can't "define" (an
assignment statement) the handle with GetLightbulbHandle() which
takes an unitialized pointer to the light bulb handle and returns an
error code. You'd be assigning the error code to the handle. It has
to be "declared", pointed to, passed, stashed, slashed, and
degassed.
How many more people do you think that would take, Kevin?
--
Best Regards,
Mike
C
Chaos Master
Guest
In article <pan.2004.11.17.04.45.11.95265@neodruid.org>, null@example.net
says...
A: None. They prefer darkness, after all.
--
Chaos MasterŽ, posting from somewhere near Porto Alegre, Brazil.
"It's not what it seems, not what you think. No, I must be dreaming."
http://marreka.no-ip.com | http://tinyurl.com/46vru
http://renan182.no-ip.org | http://marreka.blogspot.com (in Portuguese)
says...
Q: How many gothics (sp?) does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They prefer darkness, after all.
--
Chaos MasterŽ, posting from somewhere near Porto Alegre, Brazil.
"It's not what it seems, not what you think. No, I must be dreaming."
http://marreka.no-ip.com | http://tinyurl.com/46vru
http://renan182.no-ip.org | http://marreka.blogspot.com (in Portuguese)
T
Tim Wescott
Guest
Chaos Master wrote:
--
Tim Wescott
Wescott Design Services
http://www.wescottdesign.com
I think it's "goths", at least in the states.
--
Tim Wescott
Wescott Design Services
http://www.wescottdesign.com
P
Paul Hovnanian P.E.
Guest
Q: How many Marxists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. Every light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
--
Paul Hovnanian mailto
aul@Hovnanian.com
------------------------------------------------------------------
On a clear desk, you can sleep forever.
A: None. Every light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
--
Paul Hovnanian mailto
aul@Hovnanian.com------------------------------------------------------------------
On a clear desk, you can sleep forever.
K
Ken Smith
Guest
In article <pan.2004.11.17.04.45.11.95265@neodruid.org>,
Rich The Philosophizer <null@example.net> wrote:
back on".
It takes two surrealisting painters, one to hold the fish bowl and the
second to bend the clocks.
It takes 0.99674 Pentium designers to change a light bulb.
It takes one lawyer to say "Objection, there is no evidence that there is
a light bulb". If its a civil rights lawyer he will add "nor proof that
anyone has the right to change it". If it is a personal injury lawyer he
will add "and my client was injured as a result"
New mothers will have to find the little diapers first.
It will take dot bombers to change a light bulb. To be more exact they
have to pool all their money to buy the new one.
--
--
kensmith@rahul.net forging knowledge
Rich The Philosophizer <null@example.net> wrote:
It takes one Microsoft help line person to say "Turn off the light and
back on".
It takes two surrealisting painters, one to hold the fish bowl and the
second to bend the clocks.
It takes 0.99674 Pentium designers to change a light bulb.
It takes one lawyer to say "Objection, there is no evidence that there is
a light bulb". If its a civil rights lawyer he will add "nor proof that
anyone has the right to change it". If it is a personal injury lawyer he
will add "and my client was injured as a result"
New mothers will have to find the little diapers first.
It will take dot bombers to change a light bulb. To be more exact they
have to pool all their money to buy the new one.
--
--
kensmith@rahul.net forging knowledge
K
Keith Williams
Guest
In article <cnh8df$rh5$2@blue.rahul.net>, kensmith@green.rahul.net
says...
--
Keith
says...
"Reinstall electrical service."
--
Keith
P
petrus bitbyter
Guest
"Tim Wescott" <tim@wescottnospamdesign.com> schreef in bericht
news:10plr1rpack9o02@corp.supernews.com...
Q: How many communists..........?
A: None. They wait for the party to take action
Q: ... capitalists............ ?
A: None. They don't want to spent the money
Q: ...socialists.......?
A: None. The government should do it.
Q: ...believers........?
A: None. They saw the light already.
Q: ...disbelievers.......?
A: None. They don't want to see the light.
Q: ...anarchists........?
A: None. They like the dark.
Q: ...microsoft engineers...........?
A: None. They learned the standard advise: "Do nothing".
Q: ...pacifists.........?
A: None. They want to keep their hands clean.
Q: ...columnists........?
A: None. But they'll write about it.
Q: ...photographers.......?
A: None. They use their own flashes.
Q: ...monks...........?
A: None. They use candles.
Q: ...lawyers.........?
A: None. But they will sue the responsible guy (if you pay them).
Q: ...women.........?
A: None. They'll wait for a man to do it. (Except for the women who read
this of course. They do it theirselfs.)
Q: ...detectives........?
A: None. But they may find someone.
Q: ...terrorists...........?
A: None. They're blind after all.
Q: ...soldiers............?
A: None. They use infrared.
Q: ...lovers.......?
A: None. They switched off the light already.
Q: ...politicians.........?
A: None. But they'll form a committee.
Q: ...managers........?
A: None. (But it does not make any difference. They don't see your problems
after all.)
Q: ...programmers......?
A: None. They do with their screens.
Q: ...sales representatives.............?
A: None. But they will sell you all the bulbs you'll ever need and more.
Q: ...cowboys...........?
A: None. They shoot out....
Q: ...nuclear specialists..........?
A: None. They give light themselves.
Stretch this list for yourself if you want to. I don't wait for anyone but
use to do it myself.
petrus bitbyter
---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.796 / Virus Database: 540 - Release Date: 13-11-2004
news:10plr1rpack9o02@corp.supernews.com...
Can be extended ad infinitum. To mention only some:
Q: How many communists..........?
A: None. They wait for the party to take action
Q: ... capitalists............ ?
A: None. They don't want to spent the money
Q: ...socialists.......?
A: None. The government should do it.
Q: ...believers........?
A: None. They saw the light already.
Q: ...disbelievers.......?
A: None. They don't want to see the light.
Q: ...anarchists........?
A: None. They like the dark.
Q: ...microsoft engineers...........?
A: None. They learned the standard advise: "Do nothing".
Q: ...pacifists.........?
A: None. They want to keep their hands clean.
Q: ...columnists........?
A: None. But they'll write about it.
Q: ...photographers.......?
A: None. They use their own flashes.
Q: ...monks...........?
A: None. They use candles.
Q: ...lawyers.........?
A: None. But they will sue the responsible guy (if you pay them).
Q: ...women.........?
A: None. They'll wait for a man to do it. (Except for the women who read
this of course. They do it theirselfs.)
Q: ...detectives........?
A: None. But they may find someone.
Q: ...terrorists...........?
A: None. They're blind after all.
Q: ...soldiers............?
A: None. They use infrared.
Q: ...lovers.......?
A: None. They switched off the light already.
Q: ...politicians.........?
A: None. But they'll form a committee.
Q: ...managers........?
A: None. (But it does not make any difference. They don't see your problems
after all.)
Q: ...programmers......?
A: None. They do with their screens.
Q: ...sales representatives.............?
A: None. But they will sell you all the bulbs you'll ever need and more.
Q: ...cowboys...........?
A: None. They shoot out....
Q: ...nuclear specialists..........?
A: None. They give light themselves.
Stretch this list for yourself if you want to. I don't wait for anyone but
use to do it myself.
petrus bitbyter
---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.796 / Virus Database: 540 - Release Date: 13-11-2004
G
Ghazan Haider
Guest
How many sci.electronics.design readers does it take to screw in a
lightbulb...
Hmmm. lets see, 20 and still counting. They'll post it online to try
and figure out how many, and the topic will spin out of control and
eventually die.
lightbulb...
Hmmm. lets see, 20 and still counting. They'll post it online to try
and figure out how many, and the topic will spin out of control and
eventually die.
C
Chaos Master
Guest
Isn't Tim Wescott missing?
[]s
--
Chaos MasterŽ, posting from somewhere near Porto Alegre, Brazil.
"It's not what it seems, not what you think. No, I must be dreaming."
http://marreka.blogspot.com --> news, hotter than high-power transistors!
Exactly, it is.
[]s
--
Chaos MasterŽ, posting from somewhere near Porto Alegre, Brazil.
"It's not what it seems, not what you think. No, I must be dreaming."
http://marreka.blogspot.com --> news, hotter than high-power transistors!
P
Pig Bladder
Guest
On Wed, 17 Nov 2004 16:15:37 +0000, Kryten wrote:
--
The Pig Bladder From Uranus, still waiting for some hot babe to ask
me what my favorite planet is.
of the burnt offering to Our Goddess Of Pleasure.
--
The Pig Bladder From Uranus, still waiting for some hot babe to ask
me what my favorite planet is.