How I do I get my password and user name back the way they w

[Stephany Alexander]

Hi, My name is Sitre Magana. After I was caught jacking off in front of
everybody at the Post Office, the system administrator changed my
username to "pud" and my password to "pounder". Now, my co-workers are
getting in my work account, and saving porn in my home folder.

The questions is in the subject line.